


Graduation

by Glowcloudwasright



Category: Lumberjanes
Genre: Big sister Jen, Found Family, Future AU, Future Fic, Gen, Graduation, Jen is graduating, Mentions of Cancer, Mentions of homophobia, Reminiscing, and everything the girls taught jen, duh - Freeform, everything jen taught the girls, mentions of abuse, mentions of depression, the girls visit her, they are all dorks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:13:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23883589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glowcloudwasright/pseuds/Glowcloudwasright
Summary: Jen is this year's class valedictorian, which means she has to deliver a speech during the ceremony, a difficult task since she doesn't seem to find the inspiration to write. Until she starts remembering all that college, and her Lumberjanes, taught her through the years.
Relationships: April/Jo (Lumberjanes), Mal/Molly (Lumberjanes), Roanoakes
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	1. Jen pt. 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to upload this as One Big Fic (tm) but I kept adding stuff to the story so it seems better as a multi chapter.  
> I really love this idea that after camp the girls all stick around and are there for eachother, despite the distance. So I hope you enjoy it!

It was late in the afternoon and the sun was beginning to set around campus, coloring the buildings and paths with tones of orange and gold. Most of the seniors were around the cafes, pubs and plazas, celebrating in groups of dear friends, some crying, some laughing, remembering the past four years of their life, which concluded tomorrow with their graduation. 

Leaving a small pub near one of the science buildings was a group of friends, all seniors, remembering and celebrating their last day together for the discernable future. Amongst them, was a girl; tall, lanky, with dark skin and wild curls that poked from under her green beanie, laughing at a long forgotten anecdote one of her friends had just shared.

“Hey Jen, we’re going to Sean’s, you coming?” The girl asked after the laughter had dissipated.

“No thanks, guys. I have to work on my speech for tomorrow.”

Jen wanted to accompany her friends for as long as possible, but a sudden wave of melancholy and anxiousness had just washed over her. Partly because she was this year’s valedictorian, who as custom had to deliver a speech for tomorrow’s ceremony in front of the other graduates, faculty, families, etc. The only thing was Jen hadn’t started her speech.

“You haven’t started writing your speech?!” A shorter girl asked from behind her.

“Of course I have!” This was a lie. “But I still have to revise it and make sure it’s perfect.”

“Phew… You scared me; I thought you were planning on writing the speech like an hour before or something.”

Jen let out a nervous laugh, because who would do that?

She would, apparently.

The group said their goodbyes, some not quite ready to go home yet and some heading back to rest for tomorrow. As she was leaving, everyone wished Jen good luck, which only made her even more nervous.

The sun was now setting, so Jen decided to give her usual path to class one last walk. She wasn’t too eager to get to her room; even she did have to start her speech. But how could she? Every time she sat down to write she got too overwhelmed about it, too sad, too nervous to resume her experience in a few words on paper. Jen had sat down a month prior to start the speech, the same day the dean and her favorite teacher, Ms. Vaughan, had laid the news on her that she would be this year’s valedictorian. Of course she was honored, thrilled to be representing her class in front of everyone. Besides, she had worked her ass off to be top of her class. Jen had earned this honor with her blood, sweat and tears.

So why did she feel like she wasn’t fit for it at all?

Why couldn’t she write anything past “Good afternoon students, faculty and family”?

Maybe she wasn’t as fit for the title of valedictorian as everyone believed.

Jen felt sick and as if she couldn’t breathe while walking past the library. She hadn’t notice how fast she had been walking, so she decided to sit on a bench to try to calm down. She pulled out her phone and noticed she had received a text. The name on the screen made her smile a wide grin as the phone’s screen lit up her face.

The sender read “Roanokes” with a bunch of different emojis with no discernable meaning. It was her and the girl’s group chat, made in an attempt to keep in touch years before. Jen opened the information page on the group, reminiscing about the five little girls that had become like sisters to her. While scrolling through the profiles she couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her mouth. They say social media could be something very personal about yourself, even if you share it with the entirety of the world, and this was true, Jen thought, while seeing the girl’s profiles.

April’s profile picture was a picture of her, with a trophy in her hand with a flexed arm and her signature winning smile. She swore this girl could do Colgate commercials if she so pleased. Jen didn’t quite remember if said trophy was from when she earned the title of national wrestling champion in the light weight category or from the State’s literary contest for young authors. Either way, it made her really proud of her feisty one.

Jo’s picture had her on some kind of laboratory or studio, lost deep in thought while working on some kind of machine. Security goggles on her face, but not even those could hide the spark on Jo’s eyes; the same spark she always had while working on a new project or solving a puzzle of any kind. Jen thought it was most probably in the facilities of Jo’s early college program for gifted youths, where she had transferred with a full scholarship. Jen was so proud of her smarty pants.

Ripley’s picture was a selfie of her, surrounded by a mountain of kittens and puppies and one older and grayer Bubbles. Jen remembered this one because of the amount of pictures Ripley had send and because of the long talk they had about Ripley not being able to adopt 27 puppies and 35 kittens. Either way, while volunteering at her local animal shelter she had managed to find a home for every single one of the little critters. The staff at the shelter had never had such an eager volunteer, and certainly had never had every single pet adopted in such short time. She was proud of her caring and crazy one. 

Mal’s picture had her sitting on a stool, maybe at a café or bar, with her guitar in hand and a spotlight all to herself. Jen recognized the guitar, even more busted than she remembered from her camp days and with even more doodles and stickers in it. Jen could still hear the campfire songs strumming in Mal’s fingers and the several covers of several songs Jen only knew a few of, but that still made her smile, seeing her girls singing at the top of their lungs. This picture was probably from one of Mal’s local gigs, which she made sure were recorded for the girls every chance she could. Mal had improved a lot on her musical abilities, and Jen was proud of her little rock star. 

Last but not least, Molly’s picture had her tending to a beautiful garden, with gardening gloves on and the biggest smile she could manage, often seen when she was helping others or when she was focused on her projects. Molly had been volunteering at her local botanical garden, until they offered her a half time job there after class. Jen knew about Molly’s situation with her parents, so she was glad she was doing something that kept her out of the house and that made her so happy. She thought that probably Mal had snapped the picture on one of her trips to visit her girlfriend. Molly rarely shared pictures of herself; it was mostly the plants she tended to and little animals she found around the garden. Jen was so proud and happy for her outdoorsy one. 

Jen saw the las messages that had been sent and smiled. It was the girls letting each other know they were on their way for the ceremony tomorrow morning. Jo, Ripley and April were carpooling there, as were Mal and Molly, all slightly competing to see which group would arrive first. Putting her phone away in her pocket, Jen sighed happily. It was hard to believe she could barely breathe just a few minutes ago. Maybe it was the excitement of seeing them all again in person, but still, the girls had that calming effect on her; even if they got on her nerves sometimes.

Jen stood up from the bench she was sitting on and resumed her walk; maybe that could help her think.


	2. Jo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things Jo taught Jen.

_Okay Jen, you’ve got this._

It was now 7:30 pm, the sun had set and Jen was at her desk in her room, repeating herself this mantra to try and get some writing done; but truth was, she didn’t got his. Jen felt lost in this duty, in this assignment. She hadn’t feel like this in a long time, so frustrated with the task at hand, so frustrated with herself and feeling so unfit for this, like there must have been some kind of mistake and she wasn’t supposed to deliver the speech after all. Jen could feel tears starting to form on her eyes, so she took a look at the amount of scrunched up papers and pens scattered around the table and decided it was time for a break.

“I need some caffeine.” Jen said to herself.

This particular feeling wasn’t new to Jen, but it had been a long time since it took such a toll on her. While walking out of her room she remembered the first time she felt like that in this very same building.

It was the first month of class of her freshman year, the period after orientation, when assignments and lectures and college life really started to kick in. Jen had never had a hard time with academic things; it was all inside her comfort zone and she had managed to take almost only AP classes in high school, maintaining perfect grades and tons of extracurricular activities.

But college was different. She was far away from home, from her parents and friends, she didn’t know anyone here and most of her teachers seemed set on the idea that only a few of their students would actually pass their classes. It didn’t seem to matter how smart or how organized she was, what she did to stand out before was the bare minimum required here. Nor her GPA or her NASA internships or her volunteer work seemed to stand out from what her peers had in their very own curriculums; and on top of everything, Jen had a scholarship to maintain.

After one particularly bad Intro to astrophysics class and a failed Advanced Calculus test, Jen felt crushed. Her assignments were piling up, she hadn’t had the time to call back her parents, her diet was terrible and her sleep schedule was even worse. Jen didn’t know what else to do but to crawl to her bed and weep. She didn’t deserve to be there, much less with a scholarship; some other kid, way more fitted and gifted than her could have used her spot way better than her. Maybe even her career choice had been a mistake, how many people were actually successful with a degree in Astrophysics anyway? Only geniuses. And Jen didn’t feel like a genius at all. She was just some girl who liked looking at stars and reading about planets.

At that moment she heard her phone ring. It was probably her mom calling again, and here Jen was, ignoring the call again because she simply couldn’t face them, not when she knew they would ask her how everything was going and she would have to lie yet again. She wasn’t sure she could keep lying any longer.

The phone rang again after going to voicemail the first time and Jen was ready to turn it off and continue her wailing. Except, when she grabbed her phone it wasn’t her mom who was calling. It was actually,

“Jo?”

Jen wiped her tears with the sleeve of her hoodie and composed herself. She kept in touch with the girls, but they never called each other; only on special occasions like birthdays, but even that was usually a scheduled video call.

She could hear the younger girl crying on the other end of the line.

“Jo is everything okay?”

Jo took a deep breath and explained herself.

“I’m sorry, Jen; I know you must be really busy, I should’ve text you first or something-“

“Hey, don’t be sorry, it’s okay.” Jen’s tone was calm and loving. It helped Jo calm down a little. “What’s wrong?”

Jo began talking to her about this school program that had their eye on her. It worked as a sort of high school for academically advanced young girls, which nurtured them on different subjects and prompted them to graduate a little early and start college once they were done with school. It sounded like a dream to Jen honestly, with facilities as technologically advanced as most Ivy League colleges, some Nobel laurates even padrone the projects. Jen couldn’t think of a better fit for Jo. On top of everything, they offered her a full scholarship; not that her dads needed it, but still.

“So why are you crying?”

“I- I’m not sure. It sounds like too much… I’m just fifteen years old and this is basically college already, maybe worse. These girls are all ridiculously smart.” Jo wasn’t crying anymore, which Jen thought was good.

“Jo. YOU are ridiculously smart. You built a supernatural wave detector out of, what do I know, branches and loose screws you found around camp.”

“It was actually a bit more complicated than that.”

“I don’t care. How many kids your age would have done that?”

“I mean-“

“None. Trust me. I know.” Jen could hear Jo laugh at that last part. “It does sound like a lot of responsibility right now, but it also sounds really fun, you’ll get to experience new things and learn so much, even if it is a your own pace. Which is still a really fast pace. And it’s not that far away from your home; you won’t even have to live on campus if you don’t want to.”

Jo sighed, processing what Jen was telling her. Still, Jen suspected there was a little bit more behind Jo anxieties.

“I just don’t feel like I’ve earned it… You know?” Jen knew. “I don’t want to be there just to fill a diversity spot.”

Jen knew that Jo wasn’t the most confident person on the planet, that award was probably for April or Ripley, but add to that equation being trans and being a teenager? Well, that was a lot. She knew Jo struggled with her image and how she presented herself, she struggled with her heritage by being an adopted kid, struggled with having things in common with her peers sometimes, and struggled with the preassure of being a "kid genius", maybe she thought that she would be struggling with academics too, and that would be too much. That was the one thing that made Jo feel like, well, Jo. The one thing she could always manage, were she had full control and were she could find an answer no matter what.

“Listen, Jo. This is completely your choice, not your teachers, not your dads but your own, and I’m sure that no matter what you decide they will support you, even if you choose to stay were you are. That being said, if you choose to go, this bunch of smart people are interested in you for a reason. And that reason is that you are just as much of a CAPABLE and SMART GIRL as anyone there. And you better not let anybody tell you otherwise.” Jen could hear Jo sniffing again. Jo hadn’t mentioned those particular insecurities, but Jen knew. Jen always knew what was up.

Jo was silent for a while and if Jen knew Jo as much as she thought she knew she had to say something to get through to her. Jo could be stubborn and it could be hard to changte her mind once it was set. Jen could only hope it wasn't set already on giving up this oportunity.

"And what does everyone have to say about this?" Asked Jen, trying to sound nonchalnt.

"I thought it was only my choice." Jo answered. 

"I'm just asking." Jen wasn't just asking, she was finding leverage.

"I... haven't told anyone." And there it was. "They contacted me through school but my principal tought I should be the one to tell my dads. Good news and all... And I really don't want to tell April."

"And why haven't you? Didn't this happen days ago?"

"Because I know what they're all going to say! My dads will think this is an amazing opportunity to keep on track with my "life plan" and Aprill will be sad and feel like I'm abandoning her..."

"Jo, you can't be sure of how they'll react until you tell them." Jo was really listening at this point, or so Jen hoped. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Is that how you think they will react or how you hope they will react?"

"Wha- What does that even mean?!" 

"I'm just saying, maybe..." Jen started off her sentence, not sure if she was now talking to Jo or herself "You want your dads to react like that so it feels like it was their choice and not yours, so if anything happens... It wasn't you who made the wrong choice." 

Neither Jo nor Jen could possibly know this throught the phone, but a single their rolled down both their cheeks at that moment.

"And maybe you want your friends- April, to convince you not to go because you are scared. Because it's safer there with her." They were both silent now, letting seconds that felt like hours pass by.

“You’re-... Maybe you’re right, Jen.”

“I always am.” She joked. Jo groaned, but she could hear the smile through the phone. “Get some rest and think it through, you don’t need to make up your mind today, it’s not good to make decisions while hot headed.”

“Alright. But-“

“Mhm?”

“Nothing. I’ll think it through and let you know, is that okay?” Jo wasn’t really a talker, Jen knew this. She was a thinker.

“Of course it is. And I’ll be proud of you no matter what. We’ll all be.”

"Also... dang, Jen."

They talked for a little longer for Jo to compose herself a bit (and Jen too). Jo updated her on April’s current shenanigans and her dads projects, which were always interesting. Told her about the telescope she had been modifying to see the upcoming eclipse so well you might even see inside the craters of the moon. This was hyperbole, Jen hoped. They talked about school and life and general.

“And how’s college going?” Had asked Jo.

Jen took a deep breath and answered.

“You know, it’s… harder than I thought it would be. But I’ve got this.” For the first time in weeks, Jen wasn’t lying. She truly felt like she had it.

“Of course you got this, you’re Jen!”

Now it was Jen’s turn to let out a laugh. Of course she had this, because she was Jen.

“Hey Jo, I have to go now, I have a ton of stuff to do but… thanks.”

“You’re thanking me? I’m the one who called you bawling my eyes out.” Jen was smiling, truly smiling for the first time in weeks.

“Yeah but you also kind of helped me.”

“Well, you’re welcome? But thank you. I feel much better. Good luck with school!”

“You too, Jo!”

Once the call ended Jen felt something running through her she hadn’t felt in a long time. Be it happiness, determination or just plain foolishness, she was ready to face this mess.

About a week or so later she heard from Jo again, who had taken the decision to join the program after winter break, staying home instead of at campus though. Attached was a picture of Jo, sporting her new uniform, a requirement for the school. Quite tasteful, if she did say so herself, and the pleaded skirt favored Jo’s tall figure. She grinned when she noticed a smiling April on the back, reflected on Jo’s mirror, giving her best friend a thumbs up and a huge smile.

Jen, on the other hand, was on her way to meeting with her new study group after acing her most recent test. Things were better. And she had this.

Jen was snapped back to reality from her reminiscing when the door to exit her building flew open and nearly hit her in the face. Sweet Louisa May Alcott what a way to call her back to reality.


	3. April

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things April taught Jen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's kiiiind of sad

The café she frequented was unusually empty, but most underclassmen had already gone home for break, only a few stayed behind to see friends graduate or for other personal reasons. Jen sat at her usual spot, with a big cup of black roasted coffee, a notepad and a pen. She couldn’t procrastinate anymore and perhaps her thoughts would flow better at a place so dear to her and full of memories. 

Besides, Jen loved coffee. Not just because it was the perfect pick me up or because it tasted so good, but because it reminded her of her dad. Back at home, she and her dad would have their afternoon coffee at their backyard, often accompanied by a crossword puzzle or just a conversation about their day at work and school.

During her sophomore year her dad had fallen very ill, to what they later found out was Cancer. Luckily he was in the early stages of the disease and the doctors said that after a few chemo treatments he would be better, but no one can prepare you for a diagnosis like that; especially not to receive such news over the phone, like it had happened to Jen.

It was the middle of October, so Jen was deep in the semester of her sophomore year. She had been studying at the library when she got the call from her mom. As soon as the words reached her ears she could feel her mouth going dry and blood freezing. This couldn’t be happening, she had seen her parents during break and her dad was just fine. A little tired maybe, but that was all. Jen held tight to her phone because that’s all she could manage at that moment, she was sure that if she had been standing her knees would have given in, so she focused on holding her phone and breathing. Nothing else.

Jen offered to go back home to help her mom taking care of her dad, but her mom refused. School was important and she had to maintain her scholarship, besides, they could handle it, reassured her mother. No matter how much Jen insisted, she knew her parents, they wouldn’t condone her dropping out and going back home and certainly the school board wouldn’t allow her to pick up where she left later with the scholarship. Jen felt sick, she felt scared and the worst of all, she felt powerless, impotent.

The very next day she got a job at the café near campus to help her parents with the treatment expenses. It wasn’t much, but it helped. And if Jen was able to help her dad any way she could, she would do it. She didn’t say a word to any of her friends, including de ‘janes, because what good would that do? She didn’t want to worry them and she certainly didn’t want them to pity her. She wasn’t too eager to discuss the subject either, so she just focused her days on studying, working at the café and calling her parents every night; she rarely got out or texted the girls anymore. She mostly felt sick, angry.

Angry because most days her dad was bound to a bed, too weak to even move.

Angry because she was stuck there at college until December to see her dad.

Angry because a lousy half time job wasn’t enough to help her parents pay the medical bills.

Angry because none of this was fair. 

One night Jen came home exhausted from a long day at work. She had just said goodnight to her mom and dad over the phone when she decided to check her texts. She rarely checked any groups that had nothing to do with her classes anymore, including the one with the Roanokes, so she wasn’t updated on any of their lives. Still, a text from Jo caught her attention. It was from that afternoon, when Jen had probably been working at the café.

“Hey. April would like to talk to all of us later if you are up for it. She’s got some important news.” There was a text sent an hour later. “It’s… really not good news…” 

Jen responded back and soon there were the girls on a conference call all together, like no other call they’ve had before. For instance, they were all quiet, which was weird on itself.

Jen didn’t recognize the background behind Jo and April. It was neither of the girls’ bedrooms or houses. This all made sense once April explained herself; they were at the hospital. Jen held her breath at the news; hospitals had become a difficult subject for her in the past weeks, and apparently, for April too. Her dad had been interned yesterday because of a heart attack and was on critical condition. It had happened while he was at work, were some of his coworkers called an ambulance for him and proceeded to call his sister, April’s aunt, who then called her to school telling her she would be picking her up in a while. Jen knew firsthand the feeling of receiving that kind of news over the phone, and felt a knot in her stomach. Jo and her dads had spent the night with her and her aunt at the hospital. Jo had offered to skip classes the next day to accompany April, but April insisted she didn’t, especially since she had some big exams coming up. Jen imagined Jo couldn’t care less about the exams right now.

All the girls were supportive of April and offered her words of encouragement, as did Jen. Mal even offered to drive over in case she needed anything, but April made sure to thank them and assure they were fine and her aunt and Jo’s dads were more than enough help. Besides the apparent sadness in April’s eyes and the bags under her eyes, probably from not sleeping last night, she was still smiling, assuring everyone that she was fine and that her dad would recover soon enough. April was very brave, but Jen knew when she hid her emotions behind a smile and a few drips of cockiness. 

After a few minutes the call ended, but Jen stayed sitting at her desk and staring at her now turned off phone. She knew how April was feeling.

_No, you don’t._

She didn’t know how she felt, at all. Of course her dad was really sick too and they were constantly stressing about money, but April was just fifteen years old and she had already been through the loss of her mother; now she had to deal with the possibility of losing her father too? That wasn’t fair. And despite everything, April still managed to smile and think about her friends, to make sure they knew how she was and that everything was going to be okay. April was really strong in more ways than physical.

Jen went to sleep that night out of pure exhaustion, because she kept thinking about April and her dad. About her own dad. About hospitals and feelings of powerlessness and rage.

A few days later Jen was in her bed, eating while catching up on some readings when her phone rang. It was about 10 pm, but she had a hard time focusing lately, so the phone only managed to stress her out some more. Jen had set a special ringtone for her mom in case of emergencies, so she decided to let it go to voice mail. After the phone stopped vibrating next to her she resumed her reading, until it rang again.

“What is it?!” Jen was furious at the interruption and hadn’t even checked the caller ID before blasting at the other person.

“I-I’m sorry, Jen-“ It was April.

_Oh no. Please no._

“April I’m so sorry, I- I thought it was someone else. I’m so, so sorry.” Jen beat herself up about snapping at the girl like that.

“It’s okay. I probably interrupted your study, I’ll call back later.”

“No!” Jen cried, trying to get the girl to stay on the line. “You don’t have to; I just got back home from work. Did something happen?”

“You work?” April now sounded confused. Of course, Jen hadn’t mentioned the work or anything else really in the past month.

“I’ll explain later. Why did you call?”

Jen knew April was good at hiding her emotions, but this didn’t sound like the usual April. Hell, she didn’t even sound like the April from a few days prior. April had a smile so characteristic you could hear it in her voice. You could feel it. And Jen knew that smile wasn’t there. 

The little girl started to talk about her dad, who didn’t seem to improve in the slightest since the call a few days prior. She told her about how she had decided to go back to school the next day because it was her responsibility and how she would go to the hospital every day after. Her aunt would drive two hours every day to the hospital and every night she would drive back, dropping off April at Jo’s house, since her dads had offered to have April over and drive her to school, even if she and Jo weren’t going to the same school any more. Most times Jo would accompany to the hospital, sometimes her dads would too. Jo didn’t understand April’s decision of going back to school while all this was happening and it took a huge effort for her to accept to sleep over at Jo’s in the first place. 

April made a pause while talking about this. Apparently they had fought over April’s decision of staying at school and wanting to do everything by herself.

Jen heard April now full on weeping through her words while talking about this. April had snapped back at Jo and told her to leave the hospital. She had said many things she hadn’t meant. About how this was her dad, not any of Jo’s dads and how she didn’t have any right of being as mad or as worried as April. Later she had snapped at her aunt too, over some silly thing, and had refused to go with her back to Jo’s house, so that night she was staying at the hospital by her dad’s side. 

“I was an idiot and I understand if Jo doesn’t forgive me but I’m just so- so…” April trailed off.

“So angry.” Jen finished for her, on a calm tone. She could hear April sniffing and wiping her tears.

“Yeah… But I don’t want to be. Everyone is making amazing efforts for my dad right now; they don’t deserve to have to deal with a little brat too. I should be helping and I’m doing the exact opposite…”

Maybe Jen didn’t comprehend the full extent of what April was going through, but she knew this feeling. The feeling of being angry at everyone and everything and snapping back without warning.

“April, what you’re feeling is natural. Have you talked to anyone about how you’re feeling? About your dad?”

“I don’t really talk about that stuff with my aunt. I have with Jo… But he’s like an uncle to her. It’s hard for her too so I try to be there for her. So much for that…“

“That’s really sweet April, but I’m talking about you, about how you’re feeling.” There was a long pause.

“You haven’t.”

“I don’t want to bother… Right now everybody needs me to be brave. M-my dad needs me to be brave.”

That final sentence broke Jen’s heart in half, mostly because she was sure this wasn’t the first time a scared April said that.

“You know… My dad is sick too.” Was all Jen could muster. It was the first time she said it out loud.

If Jen actually had any idea of what April was going through, she knew she didn’t need to hear words of encouragement or about how brave she is. She just needed someone to understand.

And so Jen talked to April about everything. About her dad’s treatment, its side effects, about missing him, about the sadness and the pain she felt constantly. April sympathized immediately. She didn’t tell Jen how brave she was nor did she complain that she hadn’t tell the others sooner, because April knew exactly why she hadn’t say a word. If it weren’t for Jo, she probably hadn’t said a word either.

Both girls talked for hours well until it was 2 am and sleep was creeping up on them. April told Jen about afternoons spent with her dad working on their car or chatting about life, she even mentioned the few memories she had of her mother. April rarely mentioned her mother. In exchange, Jen talked about her dad; about the first telescope he had put together for her to look at the stars and about how he sneaked a few drops of coffee into her milk when she was little because Jen just loved the taste so much.

Soon the tears became laughter and they both sounded happier, lighter.

“You should go to sleep now, April.” Jen said, her motherly instinct kicking in when she saw the hour.

“Yeah, you should too… But first-“

“Yes?”

“Do you think Jo will forgive me? I said really stupid things.” Jen could hear the worry in April’s voice.

“Of course she will, Ape. She loves you. Just make sure to apologize to her tomorrow when you see her.”

April let out a breathe that seemed to carry the last bits of worry she had been carrying around.

“Well, I’ll go to sleep now. The room’s couch is suddenly the most comfortable thing in the world.” That’s the April Jen knew. “Thank you, Jen. Really. I know your dad will recover soon.”

“Thank you, April.”

That night Jen had the best sleep she had had in a long time, and she supposed April had too. 

The next day Jen got a text mid work from April that simply read: “We’re good :) <3”, which made Jen smirk at her phone.

_Dorks._

A few days later they all got an update from April, saying that her dad had made a fantastic recovery and was ready to be discharged from the hospital the next day. Jen was the happiest she had been in weeks while reading that message.

By the time December came around her dad had his last day of treatment and Jen was back home, ready to hug him the tightest she had ever hugged him.

Jen found herself back from her thoughts when she went to sip on her coffee, only to find she had already drank it all. She looked down at the empty note pad in front of her, long forgotten in her lap.

_Maya Angelou Darn it._


	4. Mal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things Mal taught Jen.

Jen exited the café, snuggling to her jean jacket when the cold night air hit her. Maybe the coffee hadn’t work as she expected to inspire her to write her speech, but it had relaxed her a little bit. The café was at a street usually concurred by the students, so tonight most of the pubs and bars near it were filled with celebrating groups of seniors, nothing too crazy, since they had a big day tomorrow, but you could still hear laughter and yelling from inside the establishments, which dimly lit the street back to campus.

Granted, this wasn’t Jen’s usual “scene”, but she had been to a few of those bars herself, most times invited by friends to have a few drinks or to see local artists. She liked the latter the most, especially since Mal had educated her on music culture, which had surprised Jen that had nothing to do with classical music. Actually, every time she saw a great artist or discovered new music she was reminded of Mal and how she would enjoy these places so much.

On her walk back to campus Jen stopped by the entrance of one of her favorite bars, which held trivia nights on Thursdays and open mics on Fridays. Tonight she could hear a faint and kind of sad guitar being strummed from inside the building; maybe she could enter for a little while and check it out. Jen took a sit at a small tall table near the entrance, while looking at tonight’s artist, a young girl, probably a bit younger than Jen, strumming her guitar and singing along to a sad melody. The song transported her to a memory of young lost Mal, literally and figuratively lost. 

This had happened just before she started her junior year. It was still the last days of summer break, but Jen had come back to campus a little early to sort some things out with her scholarship papers. Well, that wasn’t completely true.

Despite her dad’s illness from last year, she needed to get away from her house for a few days. The cost of the treatments had taken a toll on the house finances, and her mom was usually on edge more often than ever. She and Jen fought almost constantly, until one day her mom had mentioned the new semester cost. It really hurt Jen and made her feel like she was doing more wrong than right by being away at college. That night Jen cried her eyes out, made her bags and decided to go back to her dorm a week earlier than anticipated, making sure she only said goodbye to her dad.

“You know she doesn’t mean it, honey…” He had told her before Jen left.

“She still said it.” Was all Jen responded.

At that moment Jen had made a mental note no to answer her phone once she saw her mother’s caller ID on the screen. Back at campus she kept busy with a job at one of the campus research labs as an assistant, which also helped her pay for expenses.

It had been a long day at the lab and Jen was the last one out of the building at around 6pm; perks of being the new girl she assumed. Once she checked her phone she saw 3 missed calls and several texts, all from Molly. She returned the call, trying not to think on several terrible scenarios.

“Hello? Jen?” The answer came back fast.

“Hey, Molly. How are you? Is everything okay?”

“Mal’s missing.” _Oh junk._ “No one knows where she is since last night. Her mom called me, but Mal didn’t tell me anything.” _Oh junk no._

The several terrible scenarios inside Jen’s head were now presumably infinite, but right now there was no time for that.

“I haven’t heard from her but do we know where she was last night?”

“Her mom said they had a fight about Mal going to a gig. She sneaked out and took the car with her so her mom assumed she would go there and be home before dawn but she wasn’t and she isn’t answering her phone. Her mom called the police but I don’t know…” She could tell Molly was also thinking the worst.

“Okay, I’ll try to reach her and I’ll let you know if I know anything, you do the same okay?”

“Okay, yes.”

“And, Molly? Let’s approach this calmly. Mal is a tough cookie, I’m sure she’s okay.” _Sweet Malala please let me be right about this._

“Yeah.” Molly took a deep breathe. “She is… It’s just weird she didn’t tell me anything.”

“Didn’t you guys talk last night?”

“She texted me about the gig and the fight with her mom but I was already asleep so I saw the texts in the morning. This is my fault; I could’ve stopped her from going or something.”

“Hey, this is not your fault, okay? No one could have predicted this. Right now let’s focus on locating Mal.” Jen hoped this could help Molly calmed down. They all needed to work together right now.

“Okay, yeah. I’ll let you know if I know anything. I already talked to the others.”

The call ended and Jen felt like the world was setting on her shoulders. This wasn’t like back at camp when the girls would run off into the woods and at least Jen would have the reassurance that they were together, this was much worse. Without missing a beat Jen tried to call Mal, but as she had assumed, the call went straight to voicemail.

Then Jen opened the maps app on her phone, trying to estimate Mal’s movement thought her escapade. Molly had sent her the locations of Mal’s house and of the bar this gig she was playing was in. Granted, Mal lived the closest to Jen’s college, but this was still a four hour drive from her house. Once she saw the second location pin for the bar, Jen lit up like a Christmas tree.

“Son of a-!” No need to swear, even in this situation.

Jen knew the bar. Some people from the university would frequent it for concerts and getting drunk, so she knew that it was a 20 minute drive from campus.

_But there’s no way she’s still there._

It was still worth the try. Jen ran to the entrance of the campus while opening up the app to call a Lyft.

_Please be there, please be there…_

The app wasn’t connecting correctly, because that’s exactly what happens when you’re in a hurry, so Jen decided to cover some distance walking down the street while the app responded.

_Please be there, please be there, please be th-_

She had walked down most of the street when she tripped on something big by the sidewalk. No, not something. Someone, because it yelled once Jen hit her.

“Dude, watch it!” Wait. Jen knew that voice.

“I’m so sorry, I-“ Jen knew that girl. “Mal!” Despite her confusion Jen hugged the younger girl as tight as she could, so relieved that she was okay.

“Jen?! What are you doing here?” Then Jen clicked back to what was happening.

“Me?! What are YOU doing here?!” She was now more furious than relieved, lightly smacking Mal on the arm. “You ran away, you stole a car, you’ve been MISSING since last night-“

“Hey! I didn’t steal a car.”

“Oh shut up, you got everyone worried sick. Molly called me, she’s scared to death! Your mom called the police; all the girls are at their wits end looking for any news about you! And what are you doing here, missy?!”

“Oh junk…”

“Oh junk indeed!”

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean for this to happen.” Mal’s tone was soft and Jen could tell she was really scared.

Jen took a deep breath to calm down; there would be time for scolding her later. Mal wasn’t a bad kid and she certainly wasn’t this reckless, so something must have happened.

She noticed Mal was holding a donut in her hands, probably her lunch.

“Come on.” Said Jen, dusting off her shirt.

“What? Where?”

“A donut is not lunch. We’re going to go eat something and you’re going to tell me everything.” Jen’s tone was calm but stern, and Mal knew that tone very well from camp, so she agreed. “And I’m going to let Molly know we found you.”

“Wait, no. She’ll call my mom.” That was odd.

“Mal, I don’t know what happened, but everyone is really worried. We have to let them know you’re okay.” Jen was right and Mal knew that, so she agreed once more.

They walked back to a small pizza parlor near campus, where Jen gave Mal some money to order lunch for both of them while she was on the phone with Molly and later with Mal’s mom. Jen explained to both of them that she was okay, but Mal seemed hungry, so they’d be having lunch while her mom drove all the way there to pick her up. They still had about three hours, so Mal had time to explain herself.

She told Jen about the gig, a big opportunity for her since the bar was usually so crowded, but that her mom didn’t like the idea of Mal going all the way there alone since her friends couldn’t accompany her. Mal had planned everything weeks ago and thought her mom would go with her like she used to. Truth be told, Mal’s mom was very supportive of her, she used to go to every presentation she managed to obtain, no matter where it was. Apparently, this had changed a few months prior, when her mom insisted Mal should be focusing on other extracurricular activities and on choosing a major. A “good one” as she had put it. This being Mal’s last summer before her senior year she felt like she couldn’t give up this opportunity, maybe her last one to play on a stage with a crowd full of people there to listen to her. 

“She says it’s because she worries for my future but I don’t understand why she suddenly gets so mad just by looking at me playing guitar. I don’t even need to go to college, she should be happy she won’t be paying for that!” Mal was angry, but more than that, Jen knew she was sad.

“Okay, hold on. You don’t want to go to college? I thought your mom had been saving up since you were practically born.”

“She has, but I don’t want to! I already get gigs on my own and earn my own money. Why would I waste four years at, what do I know, law school just to make her happy?”

“You don’t have to go to law school, you know? You could major on composition or sound production.”

“Tell that to my mom…” Mal said, fidgeting with the slice of pizza on her plate.

“I will.” Jen said, determined.

“What?”

“I will talk to your mom. Maybe a second opinion would help her change her mind. I even have some brochures for a college near here that has a music program.”

“You just carry college brochures around, huh?”

“Don’t sass me.”

Now they were both laughing, way more relaxed and Mal didn’t seem angry anymore. So Jen took the chance for the scolding she had postponed.

“You know what you did was really stupid, right?”

“I know…”

“And that everyone was worried something happened to you.”

“I know…”

“I know you do.” Jen simply said, taking a bite of her pizza.

“Wait, that’s it? No lecture, no “missy”?

“You’re not a kid anymore Mal, you don’t need me to reprimand you. I know you know what you did was stupid and that next time you will think about the consequences to your actions. For yourself and the people around you.” Mal lowered her gaze. She really was sorry. “But just as advice for the future. Your mom loves you and really does want the best for you. You should talk to her. Really talk, no yelling, about what you want for your future. Parents can say some nasty things, but it’s because they are under more stress than we can imagine and try to do what is best for us.” Jen thought maybe she could listen to her own advice.

“I guess you’re right.” Mal said thoughtful.

Jen could have actually talked Mal’s ear off for hours while they waited for her mom, but what good could that do? Mal was really smart; and responsible, probably the most sensate and responsible of her girls. She didn’t need another (pseudo)-adult telling her what to do. She needed someone to listen and help her calm down.

Besides, Jen knew Mal’s mom. She would handle the scolding later.

Mal wasn’t angry anymore but Jen knew she was sad and worried about what her mom would tell her, so she decided to lighten up the mood a little.

“We still have about two hours until your mom gets here. Want to look around campus?”

Mal seemed to beam a little, and eagerly agreed. They walked the streets near campus, filled with bars, pubs, coffee shops, book stores and other buildings, which Mal seemed to like, catching up with each other while strolling through campus.

“Molly was really worried, huh?” Mal asked, looking down at her feet.

“She was. She’s just glad that you’re okay now.”

“I should’ve told her where I was going, I always do. I wanted to text her but by the time I arrived to the bar my phone was dead.”

“That’s okay, she’ll understand. And probably tell you off too.” Mal laughed.

“Yeah, she will.” Mal said, smiling.

They talked some more about them and how they were maintaining a long distance relationship. About how Mal would try to drive over to Molly’s as frequently as possible to spend their free days together, since they lived a few hours from each other. This was all done behind Molly’s mom’s back of course.

Jen looked at her phone and saw a text from Mal’s mom, saying she would be there at campus in a few minutes, so they headed back. Of course Mal was scared of what her mom would have to say about the whole thing, but every worry went away as soon as Mal’s mom came out of the car to give her daughter a big hug and loud kisses on top of her head. Seeing this made Jen think of her own mom and how she probably was worried about leaving things with Jen like that. A little tear rolled down Jen’s cheek once she saw Mal clinging to her mom and crying softly.

She would call back her mom once this whole mess was sorted out.

As Jen had promised, she talked to Mal’s mom about the whole college issue, and made sure to accentuate how Mal was a very smart and talented kid, while giving to her the college brochure for her to look at. Mal’s mom listened carefully, thankful to the older girl for finding her daughter. 

A thunderous applause shook Jen from her thoughts. The girl at the stage had finished her set of songs and was thanking the crowd. Jen stood up from her seat and exited the bar; she should probably be heading back to her dorm.

Rather, Jen should probably start writing her speech soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you're liking the story so far! It was actually almost complete from a few weeks back but I had been rivising it, so it should be complete and up sometime soon <3


	5. Molly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things Molly taught Jen.

Jen was now making her way back to campus, both hands on her jacket pockets and walking with a fast determined pace.

“No more procrastinating. I’m going back to my room and writing the heck out of this speech.” She said to herself, trying to avoid any distractions on her way back.

This of course failed, since near the end of her walk was the same café she had been to earlier, now dimly lit, with the chairs atop the tables. The only people inside were the two employees who were entertained with moping the floors.

A sudden wave of nostalgia hit Jen when admiring this scene, mostly because she was used to being on the other side of the glass. She loved working on the campus research lab, and ascending the ladder from cleaning test tubes to actually being able to contribute to her own specialization in the astrophysics department, but she would always have a soft spot for the coffee shop. After all, it had been her first real job; and what a job it was. People say that working retail changes you and that couldn’t be truer. Jen had collected more than a handful of anecdotes with customers, ranging from hilarious to downright outrageous. Besides she was very grateful to that work, since the little pay she managed to get every month had helped her and her family more than once. Truly, navigating the world of job shifts and paychecks and taxes had proven to be a puzzle, one that she had to practically figure out on her own.

Jen remembered the first few months of the job after she had come back from winter break, the year after her dad’s sickness. Her dad was much better and her family was paying the treatments slowly but steady, but she had to keep the job to occasionally help out on the payments and be able to afford some stuff for herself during the semester. But still, Jen hated working there. She hated the long shifts and the rude customers and the late closing hours that could extend without so much of a heads up because someone decided they wanted a Frappuccino at 11pm.

Jen also loathed how most of her friends had never had such worries before. Most of the people attending the university were trust fund babies or at the very least very comfortable on their economic situation. A few units kept jobs while studying to help pay for student loans and their own expenses, sometimes even with scholarships. Jen tried to remind herself how lucky she was for having a full scholarship and a decent economic situation overall, but even getting that scholarship in the first place had been a whole achievement on its own.

Jen was stressed out about things she barely knew anything about. She had to budget before but it was nothing like this, setting and managing her bank account and the nonstop hell that was doing taxes.

One night after her shift had ended on time, to which she was very grateful, she saw a text from Mal to the Roanokes group chat, about how she had aced her audition for the Music program at the college Jen had recommended, earning Mal a call back for the final round of early admission, having aced her tests a few weeks prior. Jen and the rest of the girls were ecstatic for Mal and made sure to congratulate her.

It had been nothing but good news at the group lately, since Jo was done with her school program and was also applying for colleges a year earlier than her age group. April was still a junior, as Jo would have been, but was awarded a scholarship to join the gymnastics team for a renowned college after graduation. Ripley, as a freshman, had made it to the honors program of her high school, but she would much rather talk about the squirrels that made a home on the tree in her backyard that she was tending to.

Still, Jen couldn’t help but notice the absence of news from Molly. She knew Molly kept good grades, not a perfect GPA to her mother’s demise, but still pretty good grades. Still, she hadn’t talked to the girls about what colleges she wanted to apply to or even what she would like to major in. Molly would be participative and happy in conversation until the academics topic rolled around, to which she limited herself to smile, nod and congratulate whoever was sharing good news next.

Be it Ripley or April (maybe not April, since she was an over achiever) who were still rather young to be too focused on college, Jen would have understood. But Molly was a senior just like Mal. She was graduating that year and she needed to have a plan. Maybe not college per se, but a plan. 

Jen knew she probably shouldn’t meddle, but her Big Sister instinct kicked in, especially around this topic. She decided to text Molly later, just to see if she needed some help with the whole college issue, which could be intimidating to sort out all alone.

Still, Molly didn’t respond and Jen was surprised to see the next morning that the text had been read but not responded to. Maybe she fell asleep or was just tired, Jen gave her the benefit of the doubt and decided to wait for the response.

The whole day passed and there was still no sign of Molly, now Jen could declare that she was avoiding her, unusual as it was. This wasn’t good. Jen decided to text Mal and see if she knew something about Molly. Maybe Molly was just really secretive about her college plans; maybe she even had a secret scholarship or something, Jen hoped.

Mal’s response came up a few minutes later.

“I’m not sure… I’ve been sending her formularies and colleges for her to check out but she usually brushes off the topic. I’m kinda worried too.”

_This isn’t good._

Jen was quite surprised actually. Molly was very responsible and smart, and she knew this was an important topic, her whole future actually. This couldn’t just be Molly neglecting responsibilities or being forgetful. Something was up, Jen knew it.

Jen tried to text her again later that night, when she knew Molly would be home. After the second attempt went with no response, Jen decided to call her.

After what felt like an eternity, the line stopped ringing and Jen heard the familiar voice of Molly. Jen sighed in relief and started explaining the many calls and texts from the past 2 days.

“Mal told me you haven’t decided on colleges to apply to yet. I was just a little worried. Do you need help or anything, ‘cause I have a bunch of bro-“ 

“Not really, I’m okay.“

“Oh… So you have applied or…?”

“No.” Molly was more monosyllabic than usual and it was driving Jen crazy.

“Okay, I’m lost.”

Molly rarely talked about herself or if she had something going on. The only person exempt from this rule was Mal, so when not even Mal knew if something was going on with Molly, it should be something serious. Jen didn’t want to push the girl to talk to her, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep if she wasn’t sure Molly was okay.

“Jen, I really don’t want to talk about this now.”

“Molly what’s going on?”

Molly’s relationship with her parents wasn’t the best. Actually, it was terrible. Jen knew her parents, rather, her mother could be very abusive of Molly, trying to mold her to a little perfect figurine that Molly simply wasn’t. Jen knew about the snarky remarks her mom could make about any topic surrounding Molly, the unjust expectations for her and sometimes ridiculous demands, ranging from Molly having to wear dresses to every family reunion, no matter how much she hated it, to how Molly had to find a good husband and settle down in some kind of suburb. Jen personally believed Molly’s mom was stuck in some form of 50’s apple pie America mindset, and that she insisted everyone around her had to follow said mindset. Molly’s sister had no problem to oblige and her dad was more of a representative figure rather than an authority, so this left Molly on her own, trying not to get washed up by the tide that was her household.

This all made Jen incredibly mad, but also sad. Molly was a great girl, who deserved to not only be celebrated and supported, but loved for who she really was.

After there had been no response, Jen spoke again.

“Hey Molly, I don’t want to over step but-“

“But you kind of are.” This was weird. Molly never talked back like that.

“Excuse me?”

“Jen I appreciate everything you and Mal and the girls want to do for me, but the thing is you don’t know the first thing about what that topic is like for me here.” Molly sounded angry, so Jen needed to keep calm and level with her.

“Then why don’t you explain it to me?”

“What good would that do…” Those were Molly’s last words before hanging up.

_Oh no, missy. This isn’t over._

Jen could be persistent, some might even say annoying, and Jen had no problem with that label at all. She cared and she cared deeply, especially about her girls.

Jen rang Molly again.

And again.

And again.

After the third time the call started going straight to voice mail. It was time for plan B.

Jen then called Mal and told her what had happened, Mal was now even more worried about her girlfriend, but Jen had a plan to get Molly to at least listen to what she had to say. Of course, Mal was on board.

After a few quick texts and catching up, the rest of the girls were in on the plan too, which was basically an intervention of sorts. Basically, they would get Jo to ask Molly for help on a new program she was developing, to which Molly would need to connect to a server Jo had modified. The thing was, while in this server, Molly wouldn’t be able to hang up from the video call. That’s when the call would turn out to be a video conference, where they’d all talk to her, talk about their feeling and plans for the future and Molly would graduate top of her class in four to five years. Easy! As Jen had described it. 

But this isn’t what happened at all.

“You need my help? Couldn’t April help you?” April was sitting behind Jo’s computer, facing Jo, with Mal, Ripley and Jen on a call in her phone.

She mouthed to Jo “Say I’m at training or rehearsal or something.” Jo wasn’t very good at reading lips.

“Her, um… computer… broke down. Yeah, it broke down.”

“But we talked yesterday…”

“It broke down a few minutes ago. Because of… virus.”

Jen couldn’t see April from the call, but she knew she was face palming at Jo’s attempts to keep the lie going.

Despite everything, Molly end up connecting to the server Jo had pointed out, and now it was time for the big reveal. That would have been more dramatic, if Ripley hadn’t connected to the server before queue.

“Is this thing on? How do I-“

“Ripley?” Asked Molly, upon seeing the girls face very close to her camera on her laptop screen.

“Oh hey, Molly! I guess it worked.” Ripley cleared her throat and put on a deep voice. “This is an intervention.” 

“No it’s not!” Yelled Jo from her side of the screen.

“Guys, what the junk is going on?” Asked a very confused Molly.

All flare and dramatics aside, the rest of the girls connected to the server for the video call.

“So much for theatrics…” Had said April once they were all together.

“I’m sorry Molly, but we’re worried about you.” Said Mal, a little calmer from the stress she had been suffering earlier with the mishaps and lying to Molly.

“You’ve been avoiding this topic for a long time Molly. We have to talk about your graduation plans.” Jen stated. “I asked Jo to use this platform because it won’t allow you to hang up on us.”

“Yeah! That’s my genius!” Said April cheerily from her shared screen with Jo. “But also, yeah, this is pretty serious.”

“So, you guys tricked me to make me talk about something I don’t want to talk about.”

“We just want you to listen for a little while, Mol.” Said Mal, rather sad about the whole thing.

“Well, I don’t want to.” With those last words Molly did what no one considered would happen.

She closed her laptop, screen going black and was cut off from the call.

The girls sat there, dumb folded about the rather obvious fail in their plan.

“Why didn’t we think she could do that?” Asked Ripley, as confused as the others. 

“How didn’t I think of that?” Asked Jo, with her hands covering her face and April patting her back in comfort.

“We shouldn’t have done this.” Jen admitted, feeling like she had done more wrong than right. Now Molly was probably angry at her and the rest of the girls and with a good reason.

“No, you’re right Jen, this is a serious topic and Molly keeps putting it off. I know her family won’t do anything about it so we have to!” Mal sounded determined, enough to get Ripley out of her confusion and Jo out of her wailing. “I’ll talk to her and get her to talk with us. You guys okay with that?”

Everyone agreed and disconnected from the call. Jen trusted Mal and truly valued how much effort she put on Molly and every one of the Roanokes.

After an hour or so Jen got a text from Mal, saying Molly had agreed to talk only to Jen. Jen didn’t know what Mal had said to her, but she agreed and soon got a call from Molly.

“Hey.” Molly’s voice was soft, kind of scared even.

“Hey, Molly.”

“I’m sorry I was a jerk. I’m ready to talk.”

“That’s okay. Can you tell me why you don’t want to go to college?”

“I want to, I really want to. But I can’t.” Jen limited herself to listen, really listen to Molly and only ask questions when she needed a little more information on a topic.

Molly told her about an ultimatum her mom had delivered to her a few weeks before: Molly either went to law school or her parents weren’t paying for college at all. Of course, the news had been delivered way more severely and with a variety of snarky remarks and threats. Molly, being used to insane requests like this one, limited herself to half listen, hold back her tears and close her fists as hard as she could until it was over. Jen had to hold the tears herself while listening to this, although she didn’t know if these were tears of sadness or because she was so angry.

Molly even knew what she wanted to study, had an idea at least. She wanted to help people, be a social worker or counselor of sorts, something she didn’t dare tell her mother, because she knew her response would be that it was an inferior career for crazy people and bums. There was no negotiating and Molly knew that; it was either law school or nothing, and Molly much rather preferred nothing. She thought that maybe she could save up some more money and leave her house and figure it out from there, but who was to say if it would work.

The feeling of helplessness and rage was such that Molly limited herself to let time pass her by, as if it would delay the inevitable.

“I have some money saved up but it’s not nearly enough to afford tuition and my own expenses. If I move to another state I won’t even have a job to maintain myself while I study. I’m just… I can’t do anything.” Molly’s voice cracked a little at the last part.

“Have you thought about applying for scholarships?”

“That’ll probably take me nowhere. I’m not smart like you or Jo, I’m not athletic like April or Ripley and I’m certainly not talented like Mal.”

“Now wait a minute” Jen interrupted. “Molly you’re amazing. You’re all of those things and more, and with your grades you are completely eligible for a scholarship.”

“You really think so?” Jen could tell Molly was sobbing a little.

“Of course I do. You just need help, maybe? This is a lot to do on your own.”

“T-that would be nice… But I really don’t want to bother you or the girls, I know you’re all so busy. I-“ There was a pause. “I just feel useless… Like a burden. I don’t want to be a burden for you too.”

“Molly.” Jen’s tone was stern. “You are not a burden, and don’t let anyone make you feel like that. These things are tough, there’s not one single guide to navigating adulthood. But you got us, every single one of us. Never forget that, please.”

Now Molly was most likely full on sobbing, from what Jen could hear at the other end of the line.

“Thank you, Jen…” She said.

“Well don’t thank me yet, we’ve got work to do. If you are up for it?”

“Yes. Yes I am.” 

“That’s my girl.”

They spent a few hours talking about what Molly wanted to do and to study, talked about housing possibilities and budgeting and half time jobs. They weren’t crying anymore, but she knew Molly must have been tired. The girls scheduled calls twice a week, as not to crash with Jen’s classes or Molly’s after school work, and for the next weeks Jen helped Molly navigate through college and scholarships applications, extra credit activities, essays, part time jobs, budgeting, and many more boring words. It was hard work and lots of emails, some nights filled with frustration and sometimes with laughter. Sometimes the rest of the girls would tag along too, specially Mal, lending ideas and background music. But no one could say these girls weren’t working their faces off.

A few disappointments came back along the way, in the form of a rejection letter from the college that was Molly’s first option. That day, however, Molly felt more determined than before to work even harder.

The hard work finally payed off a few months later, when Molly got a letter back from one of the colleges she had applied for. It was nothing too big and not too far from home, but the tuition was affordable and Molly might even be able to work close to her would be campus.

Immediately she called the girls, all hesitant while Molly opened the yellow envelope. Mal had been eating her nails out of nervousness, as was Ripley, who held Bubbles and her cat Jonesy tight while April munched on her third powdered donut to calm her nerves.

“…The faculty board…of the coming school year… for whomever it may concern… Congratulations you’ve been accepted for the upcoming semester!” 

Thunderous celebration emerged from each computer, and the sound of a very scared Jonesy running away from the noise. Everyone was so proud of Molly, who not only had been admitted, but got a partial scholarship that could help her with books and housing.

“Mol, this is amazing!”

“I knew you could do it!”

“You’re amazing!”

“Yeah Mollyyyy!”

“I’m so proud of you!”

Bubbles limited himself to chirp excitedly.

Molly was so happy she couldn’t believe the news. Months ago she believed this here, this moment, was nothing but a dream, but here she was, a few months away from graduation and on to a new adventure.

“It’s all thanks to you, Jen.”

“Oh please, I told you, we all need a little help sometimes.”

Maybe everything in Jen’s life wasn’t easy, but she knew that she had amazing people around who made the hard work worth the while, specially these amazing girls.

Jen came back from her memories once she realized she was back at campus. One short walk from her dorm room and on to write her speech. Or at least she hoped so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I dont know why each new chapter is longer than the one before


	6. Ripley

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things Ripley taught Jen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up for a death of a pet companion (It's not Bubbles) and some dialogue that kinda made me cry while writing it.

It was now around 11 pm and Jen was, despite being back at campus, circling around the vicinities of her dorm room and she didn’t quite know why. She knew she had to go back to writing her speech, it was nearly midnight for Lucille Clifton’s sake, but something kept Jen from making the walk back to her desk at all costs.

“Okay. This is it.” Jen took a sit underneath an old oak in the middle of a green patch, took her note pad and pen from her bag and laid them in front of her.

“I don’t need my desk to write. I can write here perfectly fine, I just need my- AAAH!“ Jen reached for her pen that had rolled to her side, but let out a scream when she felt soft fur instead of her plastic pen in the grass.

It had turned out to be a little squirrel, who had taken an interest in Jen’s pen and hurried over to steal it, climbing back to her tree with said pen before Jen could even react.

“Hey! That’s mine!” Jen said while standing up, trying to catch the culprit and retrieve her pen, but the squirrel was too fast and was long gone between the tree branches.

Jen plopped down to where she was sitting and let out a sigh.

“Maybe now I do need my desk…” She looked towards the dorms and back at the tree, still not feeling like going back. “Whatever, I can use my phone.”

Jen didn’t really liked using her notes app, mostly because she would usually write something down there and completely forget about it a minute later, like the many numbers and key words with no distinct meaning she was scrolling through. But still, she just didn’t feel like going back. Maybe it was because she feared falling asleep without writing her speech or because she felt like inspiration would come to her eventually if she sat very still.

While scrolling through the old notes, Jen’s phone displayed a notification at the top from the Roanokes, a selfie from the girls, sent from April’s phone. Both groups of carpooling teenagers/young adults had crossed paths on some point of the highway and had stopped at a 24 hour diner to have a late night dinner. Jen couldn’t help smiling at the sight of her little girls, now all grown up, with big smiles and scrunched up together for the picture.

Jen sent out a quick text, about how happy she was to see them all together and warning them not to drive too fast so late at night.

“Yes, moooom :p” Was Ripley’s reply.

Jen laughed and thanked the universe that Ripley hadn’t gotten her driver’s license yet, or Jen wouldn’t be able to sleep until she saw them all in one piece.

It wasn’t that Ripley was irresponsible or intentionally dangerous, she just was… overly excited, about many things. No matter how many years passed, this was a constant of Ripley. She always had a smile on her face and a hunger to do more, to see more, to be on the go and to help the little one, especially animals. While thinking of the youngest girl Jen also remembered a trick Ripley used to practice to attract all kinds of animals in camp. Squirrels, raccoons, deer, unicorns, dinosaurs, you name it; Ripley had probably pet them all.

The trick consisted on taking a bite of something to eat and leave the rest for the animal to get; this would show them that since you were eating too it wasn’t a trap so they would get closer.

Jen decided to give this a try, taking out of her bag a protein bar, taking a bite and leaving the rest of the package open a few feet away from her. She might as well try to get her pen back. After a few minutes Jen not only had retrieved her pen, but also had 3 new squirrel friends, who ran around her and took a special interest in the empty note pad in front of Jen.

She had to hand it to Ripley; the girl was really crafty and smart. Watching the squirrels jump and run around reminded her of the little girl, and their many misadventures with animals. Of course, not every memory was a cute anecdote about petting unicorns back at camp or Ripley rescuing puppies from the street. Jen couldn’t help but remember the first and last time she underestimated Ripley.

It was the beginning of her senior year there at college and she remembered the feeling of annoyance she felt after leaving the administration office on that sunny morning that reflected the first days of spring. There had been a problem with some of Jen’s volunteer work papers and so there was no register of the 100 hours of volunteer work required by the university to graduate, which Jen had already completed. Her friends insisted that she still had time to re do the hours, but Jen had taken every precaution and had scheduled her time perfectly that semester, as to not have another year running around campus doing a thousand things at once. 

And besides, she had already completed her volunteer work, why should she do it again? Of course Jen had enjoyed her time helping at the local food bank, but it had taken a lot of her time she could’ve spent at work or studying harder or relaxing from all the running around. Besides, most local activities got filled up around that time of the year with the juniors and seniors trying to get their volunteer hours out of the way before graduation.

Later and still quite annoyed, while Jen was having lunch, she got a text from Ripley to the Roanokes group chat. Apparently her pet cat, Jonesy, had died that afternoon of old age. And quiet the long age, since the beloved kitten had gotten to the mark of the 15 years old. All the girls, including Jen, showed sympathy for the youngest of them, since they all knew the attachment that Ripley had to her childhood pet.

Ripley’s parents had handled the logistics of the deceased pet, but this was not what Ripley had thought for her fuzzy friend. Ripley had a flare for theatrics and big gestures, so she thought only logical to give Jonesy a deserving funeral. Her parents, on the other hand, didn’t deem this necessary. They were already at the vet when Jonesy passed away and every one of their kids, especially Ripley, had gotten to say their goodbyes. Moving the poor animal’s body just to bury it in their backyard seemed like a bit too much, or like her parents had put it, “a little childish.”

Jen could agree to that though. Ripley was the youngest of her family, but she wasn’t a kind anymore, she had recently celebrated her sixteenth birthday actually, so she could probably understand that an elaborate funeral wasn’t very practical.

However, when explaining the occurrence to the girls, Ripley had the most monotone voice they had ever heard come out of her mouth. A mixture of sadness and disappointment Jen had never heard. Usually when Ripley was angry or sad she had an almost pout that could be heard from her voice, this was different.

A few hours later Jen decided to text Mal.

“Hey do you think Ripley is okay? She sounded weird.” 

“She must be pretty sad right now. She’ll come around.” Was the response she got. Maybe Mal was right.

The semester was on full throttle for Jen, who was managing to work at the research lab, attending classes and looking for a place to volunteer to re do her volunteer hours, so maybe not calling the girls that night would be a good chance to get some rest. All the ‘janes were fairly busy actually, with Molly, Mal and Jo preparing for college admission and April managing gymnastics training and her long list of extracurriculars.

A couple of days passed and Jen got a text from Jo about what they had talked after Ripley’s news.

“Hey Jen. Have you talked to Ripley recently?”

“Not really. Why?”

“It’s just she hasn’t being playing online any more. Barney and I texted her for a quick match but she said she wasn’t feeling up for it.”

“That’s unusual but maybe she’s still sad about Jonesy. This was her childhood pet after all.” Jen believed what she said, but a hint of doubt was hiding in the back of her head.

During a call one day, the conversation shifted to a little trip for the nearing long weekend holiday the girls had been planning, not for the better though. Jen excused herself from the trip since she still needed to complete a few hours of volunteer work. Not long after, April excused herself too, the holiday having collided with scheduled training. Jo had been caught up on a robotics project for that week too and Mal and Molly being seniors needed time to revise for upcoming tests; goes without saying that the trip had to be postponed, since the girl’s busy schedules got in the way. Ripley commented nothing on the girl’s bailing out nor on their attempts to plan for a new date. 

“We’re really sorry, Ripley. I guess we’re all just super busy these days.” Said Molly, noticing the silence of the younger girl during the call.

“Yeah, everyone’s busy these days.” Said Ripley, and the tone and of anger in her voice caught everyone’s attention.

“What do you mean, Ripley?” Asked Jen.

“Nothing. You guys have fun with school.”

“Wait, Rip-“ And just like that Ripley was out of the call.

Not long after that, Jen noticed how Ripley wasn’t talking that much anymore; instead of sending memes and random questions to the group chat she limited herself to small comments. After that, the girls noticed she altogether stopped posting on social media. Ripley could easily take 20 pictures a day and post a wide range of them, be it of her skating, her friends, animals she encountered, her shifts at the shelter, art pieces or just general things she found cool. Now there had been officially 7 days without any type of Ripley-related update and Jen was worried, especially after her storming out of the last call they had.

“I mean, we knew she’d be disappointed about the trip. It’s probably nothing.”

“She’s still sad about Jonesy.”

“We’ll make it up to her.”

And so and so the girls kept assuring each other, but Jen wasn’t sure.

Jen called her one day, having found a perfect excuse. “Hello? Ripley?”

An aunt of her was looking to adopt a kitty for the house and wasn’t very far from where Ripley lived, so she thought that she could help her get in contact with the shelter. Of course Jen could have just given Ripley’s number to her aunt, but she wanted to talk to Ripley and make sure she was okay. After exchanging hellos and Jen explained the kitten-less situation, Ripley’s response left her surprised.

“Sorry Jen, I don’t go to the shelter anymore, but I can give you their number.”

“What? You don’t? But you love it there.”

“Yeah well, I’m focusing on school; I might even find a job. Like you guys.” Ripley said nonchalantly, kind of sad even.

“This doesn’t sound like you, Rip.”

“That’s the point. My parents were right; I spend too much time doing childish things, like that stupid funeral for Jonesy…”

“Ripley that isn’t-“

“Do you need anything else? I’m kinda busy right now.”

“Well yes, I need you to talk to me, Rip. What you do isn’t childish or stupid. You are caring and creative and fun, none of those things are wrong. They make you who you are.”

“Well maybe I’m not like that anymore. You guys all have changed, why can’t I?” Ripley now sounded angry, but Jen wasn’t quite sure if it was at her.

“What do you mean?”

“You guys are all making plans for your future. We don’t see each other or talk as much. I’m left all alone to plan for this stupid stuff you guys don’t even have time for anymore. No more trips or late night conversations or anything. I-“ There was a pause. “I don’t want to be left alone with those things, so I’m planning for my future too.”

“But-“

“Goodnight, Jen.” Ripley then hanged up, leaving Jen on the other end of the line.

To be fair, even if Ripley had given her the chance to say something, Jen knew it wouldn’t have helped. She had messed up; she had been too caught up with her own stuff making it seem so big that she forgot about her friend. Maybe they all did.

Instead of calling Ripley, she decided to call for reinforcements. The rest of the Roanokes received a call from Jen then. It was Wednesday when Jen had spoken to Ripley, the would be Wednesday before their trip.

It took some convincing and some more begging, but somehow Jen got all the Roanokes to reschedule their activities for that long weekend and help with what she called Operation Make Ripley Happy Again. The name still needed some work.

By the time Friday came around the plan was on full throttle and a success, when Ripley opened the front door of her house to find her 5 best friends, all dressed in black semi-formal attire. 

“What in Malala’s name are you guys doing here?! And why are you dressed like that?!”

Bubbles ran out from the house passing next to Ripley, to perfectly land on Molly’s arms.

“We thought we owed it to you.” Said Mal, putting her hands on her black jean pockets.

“Owe what? I thought you guys were busy.” Ripley was still very confused and fairly angry.

“We’re sorry we weren’t there for you like we should’ve, Rip.” Said April.

“So we came all the way here to make things right.” Continued Molly.

“For you and for Jonesy.” Said Jo, handing Ripley a card.

Upon inspecting it, she saw it was a condolence card, with messages from all of her friends and some drawings.

“We realized we have been too focused on our own things, but we never want you to feel like we’re drifting away from you.” Jen said, stepping up to Ripley with a sweet smile. “We know it’s been too long. But, if you’d like, we think Jonesy still deserves a worthy goodbye.”

This whole gesture and seeing her friends in front of her was all too much for Ripley, who finally broke down crying and ran to hug them, thanking them through sobs.

Once Ripley had gone inside to clean up and change, they all split up in two groups like they had before the drive to Ripley’s house between Mal’s car and April’s car and drove to the Park were Ripley had found Jonesy as a little kid. Near a clearing, underneath an old oak tree, they laid a picture of Jonesy and a candle (a fake one, since it could be a fire hazard to light up a real one) and each Roanoke said a few words while Mal gently strummed a sad melody on her guitar. They finished the ceremony with some words from Ripley.

“You were the best pet I could’ve asked for Jonesy, and you were my very first best friend. Wherever you go, be it kitty heaven or anywhere else, I don’t want you to worry about me ‘cause I know I have five best friends right here that will take care of me like you did. Thanks for everything Jonesy… and please be careful with fish bones ‘cause I can’t take those out of your food anymore.” A small tear ran across Ripley’s face as she knelt down to lay a hand on Jonesy’s picture in front of her.

“Mal are you crying?” Asked Jo from the side, to a very teary eyed Mal.

“I’m not! It’s my guitar, it’s really dusty…” Molly now hugged her girlfriend, who she knew was actually crying.

“Well I AM crying. This is just so sweet.” Said April, who was cleaning her tears with a tissue as Jo hugged her too.

“That was beautiful, Ripley.” Said Jen, wrapping the smaller girl with her arm, as the rest of the girls joined on the hug.

They all stayed there for hours, underneath that old tree, hearing stories about Jonesy that Ripley eagerly shared, with her characteristic smile and blaze. When it got too dark and cold to stay outside any longer, the group decided to go grab some dinner, they still had the next day to share more stories before they all had to go back to their obligations.

“Hey, Jen.” Said Ripley as they were walking back to the cars.

Jen had barely any time to face the girl until she had her arms wrapped around her in a tight hug.

“Thank you…” Jen simply smiled and returned the hug as she could.

“Thank you, Ripley.”

Jen was shaken from her memories by two small dark eyes staring directly at her from her lap. A little squirrel had decided to lay there and seemed curious about Jen staring off and reminiscing, for the fifth time that day actually.

Jen couldn’t help but smile at the little critter that was now so comfortable with her, staring at her with round bright eyes. It even reminded her of Bubbles a little.

“Come on.” Jen said, moving the squirrel gently back down to the ground and giving it some more of her protein bar. “I have a speech to write.”


	7. Jen pt. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter everyone! Thank you so much for reading.

“April come oooon. We’re going to be late.“ Jo groaned from the door of the room, while April was still inside the bathroom, touching up her make up.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t effortlessly look like the spawn of Gal Gadot like you do Jo, my eyeliner was not cooperating.” Said April, finally emerging from the bathroom.

“Maybe, but you can make Sophie Turner eat her heart out in that outfit.” Jo said in response, holding April by the waist into a hug.

“Come on, people. You can hit on each other in the car. Let’s go.” Called Mal from the living room, checking the time on her phone.

As Molly fixed her earing, she placed a small kiss in Mal’s cheek to help with the stress of herding the rest of the girls out of the house.

“Alright. I’m ready!” Said Ripley, with a not-suspicious-at-all look and a bulge under her dress shirt.

“Ripley we told you we can’t take Bubbles to the ceremony.” Said Molly.

“But I made him a bow tie! He’s following dress code!”

“Rip…”

“Alright…” Ripley returned to the house, sneaking Bubbles into a purse when no one was watching, making a run for the car before anyone would notice.

Since Mal’s college wasn’t far from Jen’s she had managed to find an apartment for rent near there for the five of them to stay a few days for the ceremony. It wasn’t the most luxurious or big of spaces, but the girls loved to be able to sleep all together again like they were back at Roanoke cabin.

“Alright, we’re out!” Shouted Mal, closing the door behind her and holding Molly’s hand to walk to the car.

“Woah there's so many people" Said April, while they tried to locate their seats amongst the crowd.

"Where do you think Jen's parents are?" asked Molly.

"Probably up front since they have reserved seats for parents." Responded Jo, guiding the group towards some seats she saw in the distance.

Meanwhile, Ripley was struggling to keep her bag under control with all the moving Bubbles was doing.

"What's wrong buddy? You hungry?" she whispered to her bag. "Hey guys, I'm eh gonna find something to eat."

"Now? The ceremony is about to start." Said Mal.

"I'll be quick; I saw some bending machines over there." And with that Ripley was off in a half run, grappling her bag tightly.

Mal sighed. "I'll go with her in case she gets lost, you guys text me if it starts."

By the time Mal caught up to Ripley near the bending machines she saw what the whole fuss had been about, as Bubbles perked his head outside the bag to eat the protein bar Ripley had supplied.

"Ripley! What the junk? You brought Bubbles?" Mal whisper shouted, at the sight of the raccoon.

Ripley was startled by her friend's voice and dropped the bag Bubbles was in, the little creature getting a little stunned.

"I'm sorry but he wanted to see Jen graduate too! He looked so sad when I tried to leave him."

Mal knew Bubbles was rather different from other raccoons, from any animal actually, and freaky as it was, she believed Bubbles had given Ripley those big old puppy-raccoon eyes to sneak in.

"That's okay, but don't let anybody see him. The last thing we need is some tomfoolery in Jen's ceremony.”

"It would be pretty on brand for us though." As the girls chatted they didn't notice the absence of a certain raccoon, who wandered off following a familiar smell.

"Uh oh..." said Ripley, holding her now empty bag.

"”Uh oh”? What do you mean “uh oh”?!" Responded Mal, with a good reason to now be stressed out.

"Bubbles isn't here."

"God d-" Mal was interrupted by her phone ringing, it was Molly.

"Where are you guys? The ceremony is about to start."

And about to start it was, when the speaker instructed everyone to get to their seats.

"We have... A bit of a situation... Yes, yes... Tomfoolery, correct.... Alright." While Mal explained to Molly the situation at hand, Ripley tried to look for Bubbles in the vicinities.

The little fur ball of browns and black was spotted not far from there, but dangerously close to the back of the stage destined for graduates and faculty.

"There he is! Come on!" Ripley grabbed Mal by the wrist and dragged on to chase the creature.

Meanwhile, the rest of the Roanokes where rather uneasy at the news of their lost stowaway, and decided to go and help with the wild chase. Anything to ensure nothing would ruin the ceremony. 

“Are you guys sure we shouldn’t just stay put?” Jo tried to be the voice of reason.

“We have a raccoon on the loose; I think that option is out of question.” Jo simply sighed at April’s response, mainly because they were already standing up and heading towards the aisles of people sitting, looking for Bubbles.

“Why does this always happen to us?” Asked Molly, who had grown used to occurrences like this one when the five of them got together.

Jo and April simply shrugged.

They let their seats to move around the field, full with families sitting at their chairs, excusing themselves and asking if anyone had seen a raccoon around, which earned them a handful of puzzled looks. 

On her part, Jen was rather uneasy, waiting in her seat near the back of the stage to deliver the valedictorian speech at the beginning of the ceremony, holding tightly to the note pad she had been carrying around on her adventure the night before. She had just seen her parents, sporting big proud smiles wave at her from her seats; she wondered if the girls had already found her spots. 

Even though her creativity had materialized last night on what Jen thought was a darn good speech, she couldn't but feel nervous. She was so scared to not measure up to this huge honor and kind of wished she could see the girls for a moment to give her one last drop of courage. 

In that moment, like some joke from destiny, a fugitive Bubbles landed on Jen's lap, chirping happily and cuddling in her lap. 

"Bubbles?!" Jen said, surprised, while her classmates stared at the bow tied raccoon that had come out of nowhere. 

"Awww that's the cutest puppy ever." Said a girl sitting behind Jen. 

Like queue, Mal and Ripley appeared from a side, startled and chasing after the raccoon. 

"Bubbles! Come back here!" Cried Ripley, as the music started blaring from a side to signify everybody should be on their seats and silent by then. 

Of course, this rarely was the case for the Roanokes. 

"Guys! What the heck happened!?" Now, from the other side, had joined April, Jo and Molly, making their way from the rows of confused students. 

Jen couldn't form a sentence, and just sat there, with Bubbles in her lap and watching as the startled girls ran up to her. 

"Jen we're so sorry, Bubbles wanted to come along but we lost him." Mal started explaining. 

"We are so so so sorry, Jen." Said Ripley, grabbing Bubbles from her lap, ashamed.

"We didn't mean to cause a ruckus at your big day, Jen." Continued April. 

Jen’s silence was broken by laughter, the biggest laugh she had let out that day, making her lose her breath and turn red. 

"Wait, aren't you mad?" Asked Molly, confused about the laughter. 

"How could I be now that you guys are here?" Jen stood up from her seat and gave her girls a big hug. 

"So, you're not mad at the shenanigans and tomfoolery?" Added Jo, confused like the others. 

"Not really, it's pretty on brand for you guys." They all had guilty smiles on their faces. "Besides, I really wanted to see you all before the ceremony." 

A choir of awww's was heard from the girls. 

"Now go to your seats, it's about to start." The girls wished Jen good luck, while Ripley grabbed Bubbles tightly to avoid any other incidents. 

Jen let out one last small laugh, thinking about how her girls had helped her in her time of need just one more time. The universe really liked to poke fun at her. 

The ceremony was rather traditional, with soft instrumental music and the faculty head master delivering some words to the graduates about the future. Then, it was Jen's turn to step up. 

"Good afternoon esteemed faculty members, dear family and old friends..." 

Ripley pulled out her camera to take some pictures of Jen in her gown and in front of the whole school one last time, delivering the speech she had worked so hard on. 

"... Altogether. The past few years of our lives have shaped us in ways we cannot fathom, for they are so rooted in ourselves, buried in the soil of new knowledge and experiences we acquired, nurtured primarily by the bonds we made along the way..."

A little tear rolled down April's cheek and Molly held Bubbles in her arms like a stuffed toy that would help her hold her emotion. 

"... and so on. We find each other here, not only ecstatic about what the future holds, but reminiscing about our last few days inside these walls that have seen the best and worst of each of us. Questions swarming our minds with insecurities and pretenses none of us are exempt from..."

Jo held April's hand, enjoying every word Jen delivered and so so proud of the girl that had become like a big sister to them. 

"...Is other people. I can only hope everyone's experience was as much of a roller coaster as mine was, made only possible by the support system that is friends and family, found or otherwise..."

Mal was holding back tears of joy, as Molly placed a hand on her knee and she held it. They all knew deep down that the found family they had formed made possible so many amazing things for each of them, now soaking in the moment of seeing the first of them graduate. 

"...In a moment. And so, I invite you all, not just my classmates, to venture on in this journey that is life. To solemnly swear to do our best. Every day, and in all that we do," 

The girls now recognized that renowned line from their very own Lumberjanes pledge, and muttered along to every word Jen said. 

"-to be brave and strong, to be truthful and compassionate, to be interesting and interested, to pay attention and question the world around us, to think of others first, to always help and protect my friends, something about God too." 

The girls laughed at this part, as Jen smiled at the inside joke she had sneaked in. 

"And to make the world a better place. For us, and for everyone else... Thank you very much, and congratulations class of 2020!"

Thunderous applause filled the college campus, as faculty, peers and family stood up from their seats to give Jen a very well deserved standing ovation. However, no other group made quite the racket as the Roanokes did, as they all darted from their seats to stand up and cheer her friend. Jen spotted them from afar, as they applauded and waved, including a very dapper looking Bubbles on top of Molly’s head. The girl smiled sweetly as she came down from the podium, her favorite teacher whispering a word of praise to her as she took on the microphone.

“And with that amazing introduction, I’m proud to present the graduates of the class of 2020.”

Jen went back to her seat, her heart still pounding, trying to catch her breath as some of her friends patted her shoulder to congratulate her. All her insecurities from the past weeks disappeared, as she heard the names of her peers being called on stage to receive their diplomas. Maybe Jen was fit for this after all. 

_No, not maybe._

She was fit for this after all. And this was only the beginning.


End file.
